Wednesday, 4 July 2007

i'm a dreamer, i'm the biggest dreamer far around. maybe the only dreamers greater than me, are the aborighini. i would be miserable if i wouldn't been dreaming day time, night time.. always. i don't need much, just a word or two and i can make up a story to die for! i've often asked myself if i should be worried, but hey..noone is harmed, the only bad thing with this is, that it is me who often pulls the short straw on the end. cause reality is so much different from what i imagined in my head. and the stories have bitter ends. but nevertheless... i shall not stop, it's my addiction. i'm a dreamer, sonhador, sanjač...

Tuesday, 3 July 2007

terrakota had a concert in metelkova yesterday. i was of course in the first row dancing and smilling like crazy. and when the guy picked up his berimbau i was totally euphoric. it was one of the best concert in years i have to say. well, i don't go to that many concerts, so it was definetly the best one in a long time. okay, i was drunk.. but even if i wouldn't be.. i was feeling alright you know... despite all this exam period stress and work and money problems and heart problems.. i was feeling good! the energy of the day was positive. it rained, but i didn't care.. cause i was feeling fine. good feeling after long time. and then also the concert was groovin' so it was a perfect end of that day. it may had something to do with Dadás mail that he sent yesterday. i'm going to Trieste on friday, cause it's his birthday. i think it will be a nice ending of this exam period. and on monday i'm off to Rab in Croatia for a week. in my previous post i was talking about some disagrements in my capoeira group... well, it turned out that not everything will settle for the best. Dadá told me, if Ubaldo doesn't apologize to him, he will not train with him anymore. so that will be the end of our gatherings. well, we'll just have to find another way to see each other. Trieste is not so far. and i realised that the train ticket costs 'only' 20€ so it's affordable even for poor student like me. well, i certainly wnat to keep in touch with him, we became rather good friends. not so much in words... we always have language troubles, cause my portugese is not so good. but we kind of feel each other. anyways... i think it's a friendship worth putting some effort in. and as for my portuguese friends here... yesterday it was their last night here.. it was a good ending with the Terrakota. we couldn't have had it better. and we had nice time, Maria and Claudia cried all night.. but between we laughed and hugged a lot too. now they're already on their way to Romania. maybe i join them in august and we meet in Sarajevo. Sara is coming here! it will be nice to see her!! and on the end...ha, you thought i will say something about Sabin. well i'm not.. i wanted to.. but i'm not gonna. i don't know what to do... so i just try to put him out of my mind. fly away my pretty one.. fly away....

Sunday, 1 July 2007

don't be positive, be productive

i'm making my holiday shopping list. i must say, it's much more fun, than studying meteorology! but i only put 3 things on, it shows that i don't cook. eheheh! and i still don't have idea what to cook for second meal, cause as you can imagine we split the days so that everyday someone else is repsonsible for the cooking. and of course i don't intend to put meat on my menu just because of my sisters boyfriend. yes Miha you've heard it. no meat for you in my kitchen! lol! sorry mate! anyways, the other day i found out that every time i drink soya milk, it tastes better. it's a progress.. ehehe! and i still didn't try to make it myself... i always say i will. ah well..

this weekend was not the best one.. it started already on friday on trainning when some of the people, including my professor got into a fight. i hope everything will settle for the best. i really don't want to end in another broken family. it's already hard enough for me to be in two groups just because some people don't get along with others. but i love them all... i don't want anyone to fight, to spread bad energy or in any other way break the harmony. and after all this i heard today that some inhabitants were complaining over our music on the trainnings and so we have no place now to train! that's shit!! how can people be so egoistic. as if we were some kind of vandals. i mean really, they complain if you're a drug addict, if you're drinking, if you are demolishing private and public property.. and now even if you do capoeira!! for god's sake... what are we supossed to do? sit at home and play bingo with our grandmas???
and after all this also sabin didn't appear. i have no idea what to do!

so tell me please, how can a person after all this and a night job study with full concentration and energy? i thought so...

when everything is quiet

i'm in front of a serious decision in my life. don't know what to do, how to react. but i need to do something for my own sake. i'm thinking.. am i just holding desperately to something that has already passed, or is it worth taking so much time in order to recieve a blessing on the end. but nobody knows the future and we have to live up for the moment right? at least that's what i'm always saying. and waiting for something to happen is certainly not a productive spending of moments. ah, to hell with everything... i'm fucked up again!