to give for give

guilt usually seeks forgiveness. but the big Q here is...whose forgiveness and why? if i do something wrong why do i need someone to forgive me my mistake, if i know that i've did something wrong? it's just a fact, and nothing is changed if someone else forgives me for what i did. because doing something that you think you did wrong, should be forgiven only by yourself. and doing something that someone else thinks was wrong and you not seeing it so, does it also need to be forgiven? if you didn't think as wrong while doing it? and again we are at the question of various views over the same situation that can vary. i read somewhere that we never see things as they are, we see them as we are...and that's exactly what i've been saying. doing something wrong is only wrong because you see it that way, or someone else see it that way, or the society around you says that's wrong. but in the basis...it's only plain situation that is as it is. you know? yeah, it is kinda hard to understand..but it really is simple.

if i decide someone is doing something wrong i'm not trying to convince him that he's doing it wrong...i tell him my view and i leave the scene. but he funny part is that often people run after you and try to either convince you that what they're doing is not wrong, or feel guilty and try to get your forgiveness. isn't that funny? why on earth should you change your behaviour based on someone else's opinion, only to get his or her approval? well my friend that is in my opinion a sign of low selfsteem and insecurity. i try to show my friends that despite my disaproval of their behaviour, they can freely continue act as they wish. and depending on the type of their act i shall only decide whether i want to stay close to them or leave. it is only your decision if you will change your behaviour in order to make me stay, or keep on doing what you were doing not paying any attention on my presence. i'm not saying it is simple to do it, since we are not acustomed to act this way, but giving such situations importancy, makes them even harder. i know it did for me, long time ago i gave a lot of importancy to certain people and actions. and the hardest thing was to admit to myself that i need to let go and accept their behaviour as it is, even though for me it was the most horrible thing someone could ever do. but today i stand here and i know that i am here because of my own choice i've made and because of big sacrifices i did..but only for myself, because i love myself so much today. and every day i am trying to accept that fact, that people are different and that everybody makes their choices and they show their choices with actions..and actions matter, because they make you decide whether you want to stay there or go some other way. and i will forgive myself of not being able to fully understand and accept that fact until today, and i do not need to forgive anyone else.